E-Fishing for Men

i had an odd response from a match.com guy today, which, after sending him an email to say i was interested, emailed back, and just launched into why he did not want anything to do with me, before even saying hello. he said, 'first off, i am not between the ages you stated on your profile',...  the second point he made was legit, that he was an undergrad at the same institute where i teach, so that made sense. but jeez. i was a bit taken back by the rudeness..... guys can be such assholes........

it made me think about my own approach to the e-dating scene, and how to go about it. lately, i have just been looking at faces to see if they are hot, and then emailing them a quick hi, or a flirt.... seems more efficient to go for volume of flirts sent, and worry about the details later... but, now i'm thinking perhaps i need to actually narrow things down to what i actually want, so when a cute guy does show up with those criteria, i actually have more to go on that just a pretty face, like their interests, hobbies, etc.

do i need to be more discriminatory? but it's so fun to go fishing and see what comes up..... the challenge of even getting a response from a hot guy is kind of adventurous.... and if there is nothing to lose (especially online, you can send off plenty of quick emails and does not take much time) why not broaden your chances?

the problem with this, at least for myself, is that then you start realizing all the guys you emailed never give you the time of day. you can see that they viewed your profile, but then did nothing to respond. depressing. goes to show that you need to be a superstar on the online scene in order to even get noticed, and it's a freakin' pain in the ass.

i have had some luck meeting guys, though.. 1 through match.com; i'm corresponding with a couple of others through craigslist, and then another through a local gay catholic group... actually, i'm supposed to hang out with a couple of guys this week, so maybe i should hold my horses about being to overeager to meet other gay guys.  plus, i also hit a jackpot in networking with another gay guy who knows some acquaintances of mine from another university. that was a pretty cool discovery, through the magic of Facebook,, .. which can be used to search for the people you 'may know', and you can narrow this down by choosing overlapping schools, organizations, and mutual acquaintances in order to find out people who intersect. this was helpful for the local lbgt center, which has so many 'friends', that it's tough to find out who knows who. the solution.... intersect the lgbt center with friends in your local town, and you'll start to see if there are mutual friends between those two... then this helps networking.

networking is critical in the gay world, because it's so difficult, so underground, and for the type of people i want to meet (discreet, professional, masculine acting, etc)... it may be through avenues other than bars, c-list, or match.com....   bring on the networking! at least i enjoy that as a hobby; so i'm up for the challenge...