Multiple Paths Toward Truth

The following is a list of all the paths I have attempted in finding dates, friends, and male intimacy.  I have been attempting this for a little over 1 year, and I have not had much luck finding dates.  The good news.. First, I have avoided sketchy hookups, simply by learning the ropes of each on-line world.  Second, I have had 3 dates. Although they did not lead anywhere, I had the courage to go for it.  Third, I have made a really good friend online, and we continue to grow closer. 

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Posting CL ads in 'platonic" or "miscellanous romance" that emphasize
1) Christian brotherhood

2) first time experience
3) masculine, preppy, jock

5) openly frustrated emails

Joining several online dating sites

1) match.com

2) gay.com

3) plentyoffish.com

4) yahoo personals

Going into Chat Rooms

1) Gay.com

2) Yahoo Messenger

Joining Virtual Groups

1) Yahoo online groups

Joining meetup.com groups
1) Gay Christian Bible study
2) Gay Professional Group
3) Gay Scientist Group
4) Gay Outdoor Group

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It is intriguing to me the avenues which have led to the most luck. First, ads that emphasize Christian brotherhood have always led to most responses.  This is encouraging for me, because I know guys like me exist out there.  Second, ads that emphasized my frustration about the Durham dating scene elicited tons of responses, which demonstrated to me that I was not the only guy who was fed up with this.  Finally, I feel lucky to have met a really good guy on a chat room, and we continue to talk every night, establishing a strong connection. 

The fish are biting again, though.  My yahoo groups memberships have led to some responses, of just bi/gay/straight/bicurious dudes just going out for beers and watching some sports.  Also, I continue to get responses from those interested in the Christian connection as well. 

The journey continues, it is intriguing, sometimes frustrating,,, but I gain hope in each day. The most important thing I have learned is how to become self-reliant, and survive rejection.  I learn that rejection is not necessarily a reflection of me, but of the individuals on the other end.  It makes me say with confidence "fuck them, it's their loss".  At the same time, I'm able to detach myself from the situation, and move on.  These are good life skills.