Shadows

Barriers
Mind spins
Questioning my motives, my yearnings
Why have I delved into this world?
Is there a place for me?
A world of real, male intimacy, true brotherhood
A sexual intimacy that connects, trusts, exists
I do not know.
My mind spins
I betray myself, I betray others
I try too hard
In places hidden, in secret
Navigating a world unbeknownst to most people
Which forces one to explore the depths
of a dark soul.
How to seek light, how to seek love.
I do not know.
Answers elusive
Truth hides
In the shadows